Seeking Joy

It has been 15 months since my baby was born and close to 13 months since I have been unemployed. It has taken me about that long to realize those are both really big life changing events. In the beginning, the fun of playing with my new little baby was entertaining, and even though I missed work I liked the allure of being home all day to be a "homemaker". Anyway, at the end of last year  I realized that being at home all. day. long. with a baby had put me in a rut. So I made some New Year's Resolutions. All of these wonderful things I wanted to do with my time. Truth be told... I've only kept up on one of them (I am determined to stick through Mason's "365 Day Project"  -well, actually "366 day project" since this is a leap year) I wanted to do so much with my time that I think I got overwhelmed when I still wasn't doing anything with my time. 

I've started thinking, "There must be something wrong with me! Why don't I LOVE being a mom everyday? Why don't I LOVE staying home all day with my baby? I should LOVE that I don't have to go to work and juggle kids and work!" Because I wasn't loving it, I began to HATE it. Who want's to hate their job? Then I realized I am just another mom. I don't deal with anything more overwhelming than the next mom. Over the past month or so I have had some great conversations with friends. Just listening to some of their day-to-day experiences with their kids {or life in general} made me realize I am normal! I came across this sweet blog about finding joy in motherhood. She wrote in one blog entry about mothers who feel "stuck in a rut". I feel like it was written for me! And that made me realize that I am not alone, that there is NOTHING abnormal about me. I just need to change my perspective and seek more joy.

Now, please don't start worrying about me. Really, I am just fine. It has just taken me 13 months to learn how to have more joy in my new job of motherhood.